Silence.

I will not pretend that I understood you. Not anymore.
Life is too short for making presumptions and half-guesses.

I still don't understand half of the things you did,
though I pretended I did,
and look where it got me now.

Anytime soon, anytime now, I will learn what it is like
to give my life to another, as you once did. I do not know yet where it will get me.

But I do know the painful wisdom of adulthood:
silence. Long and hard, often amnesiac. Grim and grey. Edges frayed.

Ah, to be a child again. And yet,
it is nothing
but another lie.